god and the world around him

latly ive been thinkign about religion ... i almost regret not having one any more .. i ran across this guys blog http://emmentaler.blogspot.com/ hes from where i usta live .. it reminded me of christ covenant ... it was the best church ever,, it hink its the churches aroud here that contributed to my loss in faith tho ... every ones tryign to shove thier veiws down your throat but at christ covenant omy... i was happy to be there .. i felt liek i was learnign somethign i felt part of somethign important and i didnt feel leik people were gonna hate me if i slipped up a little ... but i moved here and life went to hell .. i ended up kissing a few girls .. i never said o my god till i was here for like 3 years.... never said it ... i dont realy think cussing is a sin but you know ..every one has thier loose interpretations some where.. that was mine .. but i got mad at god because he wanted to damn me to hell cuz i loved soem one he didnt approve of ... so then i went on this spiritual path .. and a self dicipline path where i ate only to not pass out and i cut i went through wiccan and anton levay - ism ( satanism but the good kind) then i just decided i couldnt beleive in anythign bigger than the world... id ont know if i ever did ... but i kind of miss the community and the ideas sorta liek i knew theres no santa but christmas is still the same

well i have to go now

vic