things i have learned this week

Don't sleep in awkward positions.
Don't be so negative, it helps nothing.
Putting your cellphone on vibrate is polite. Esp when the pitiful negative girl is trying to sleep in an awkward position and your ringtones are obnoxious.
Don't set off the alarm in LaGuardia.
Pocket texts are cuter on an android that turns the emotions into faces.
Journals save my brain.
I need to start carrying my craft stuff.
And a lunchbox.
That its kind of important to grow a pair and do what's needed.
Welbutrin isn't enough.
When I fall apart it seems everyone around me does at the same time yet unrelated.
That I have friend girls, that like me, that I don't hate and actually like too.

That I really want to have a sleepover.
And fuzzy slippers.
And to paint my nails.
I am a brat.
...a smart brat :/
That's dangerous.
I have no patience for people for so many reasons.
I like being pretty.
Sometimes I can be chick like.
Crew bag/ laptop not necisarry and very heavy/ burdensome.
Don't break your luggage handle.
Speed tape is the shit.
Speed tape will also cut you.
My memory is going to shit. But only on important things, things I should brush off and forget are wiggle forever.
My phone auto correcting "with me" to wiggle makes me giggle, a lot.
I am far needier than I thought I was.
Crews from new York in general aren't very talkative.
You can make a lot of meals from a continental breakfast.
Rob still gives me tingles when he kisses my cheek.
I can't even try to read my hello kitty watch.
Don't hand people things and walk away.
I can go a long time with no food.
But this makes me even more instable than usual.
Don't drink after doing that.
Esp with your bf. While pmsing.
Don't underestimate bfs understanding/ patience.
Planes/ scheduling respond to happy thoughts.
I am too afraid of change to enjoy myself.
I function best when I have purpose.
I don't really have a current purpose.
Out of all the shit in my suitcase I don't have pants.
I will be rid of facebook soon enough.
I still crave skating.
I still both really love and really hate my job.
I have lost touch with myself.
And most people around me.
I can come off as bitchy when I don't mean to.
Good pilots make a trip.
Music effects me a little too much.
I am ok being up north during a heatwave at home.
People are very very dumb.
Also they feel entitled.
And superior.
I have the uniform I am in charge.
Even if you are old.
I can't sleep past noon anymore.
I really like watching the news.
I love learning new things.
Only if they are interesting.
I love terry pratchet.
I used to have a lot of power.
I was also on a path to kill myself.
I still miss the power :/
I will live longer without it right now.
So will my relationship.
Miss Tori D'affair needs to be trained.
My old life has compleatly ruined my ability to trust anything.
At all.
Self preservation is important.
But self fullfllling prophecies need to be kept in check.
I need to calm down and breathe.
I don't know how.
I can't do this alone.
No one can.
I want to help my friends.